Embedded Roses - Episode 2

 

*_Dedicated to Amina Abimiku (cocomeena)_*

_AMINA_

My heart felt heavy, and my eyes felt dry. I couldn't cry, even thou i wanted to but i just couldn't. So, its really happening, am loosing jafar for good. I'm loosing him and there's nothing i can do about it other than cry. The worst part is that the tears aren't even flowing out today, I'm stuck with my pain, deep inside my heart . And such pains hurts way too much.

       I sat down with a thud as soon as i entered my room. I felt like the world is spinning and i can't hold it. I closed my eyes and drifted into the only thought that happens to dominate my life ever since he left me. THINKING ABOUT JAAFAR.

*

_FLASH BACK_

_What will i do without your smart mouth_
_Drawing me and you kicking me out_
_you've got my head spinning, no kidding i can't pin you down_
_what's going on on that beautiful mind?_
_Am on your magical mystery ride_
_And am so dizzy don't know what hit me but I'll be alright_
_my head is under water but am breathing fine_
_You're crazy and I'm out of my mind_
_Cuz all of me, loves all of you_
_Love your curves and all your edges_
_All your perfect imperfections_
_Give your all to me_
_I'll give my all to you_
_You're my end and my beginning_
_Even when i loose am winning_
_Cuz i give you allllll of meee_
_And you give me all of youuuu_.

_Damn! You voice send shivers down my spine Dee. You mean all those words you sang?"_

_Ofcourse sweriee

All episodes of this story can be found here >> https://www.ebonystory.com/story/embedded-roses

. John legend borrowed the words from me when he sang the song". He replied smirking_.

_"Awwwwn. Thank you love. I can't wait for us to get married. You'll sing me shape of you by ed-sheeran"_.

      _"I'll even sing perfect not only shape of you. I love you darling"_.

_"I love you more Dee"_

      "Lemme get going. Some stocks are coming in today and i have to see to them. Damn! All these business issue are driving me nuts. I sure are going to take three months break before our wedding, am just so tired"_.

_"Neman halal din kenan. Don't worry, in shaa Allah you'll make it. You're always in my prayers"_.

        _"I know darl, and am grateful. Take care and regards to mama and papa"_.

_"Sure. Say Hi to Zainab for me"_

*       

My heart clutched and twisted in pain. Why jaafar? Why? Is it because I'm a warrior? Are sickle patients not being able to be happy? Are they just garbages and don't deserve to feel the happiness everybody feels? I wonder what they think of themselves. Are they better than us who are suffering from the disease? Or do they think Allah loves them more and that's why they are healthy and we are sick?. What hurts more is that he knows about my illness but choose to call the wedding off just two days to!. I don't know why i still love him and can't even seem to hate him.

     I was so deep in thought and didn't even noticed when mama came inside. I only felt her warm arms hugging me and i didn't even know when i let out a deep breath i was holding.

"Cry Amina. Cry and let the pain flow out with your tears. Cry, cry". She cooed.

      And just like that, i felt the tears gushing, and i couldn't even control them. I let them flow like an ocean, i opened my heart hoping that the pain will flow out with my tears, little did i know that those pains are embedded in my heart. Yaa subhannallah, Love is the worst disease ever!.

     "Feeling any better?" Mama asked still hugging me in her bossom.

I sniffed, nuzzling my nose to her bossom. I nodded trying to look strong only for her.

     "I think its high time you forget about jaafar and move on with your life. Remember, nothing is permanent in this world, _yau dadi gobe daci_. That's life for you and me. Face it and forget about him just like he did".

I nodded my head, agreeing with mama. She said nothing but the truth. Why should keep wasting my time and tears on him when i mean nothing to him. I wiped my tears with the back of right hand and blinked back my tears.

      "I promise mama. In shaa Allah this will be the last time I'll cry because of him. I'll be strong for you and be that happy and smart girl i once was. Trust me". I said smiling.

"I trust you dear. May Allah continue to bless you".

     "Amiin yaa rabbi".

*

"Say cheese" i said to Usman

     "Cheese!" He said smiling, and click i took us a snap.

   "Now let's pout". I said again pouting and adjusting my phone.

"Why should i pout?, just snap something sis cuz i won't pout". Usman said.

       "Then forget about the picture. There's no way I'll pout and you won't".

"Ea naji din. I still won't pout".

     "I guess I'll cook dinner alone then". I said smiling mischievously.

"What?! No. Okay fine, I'll pout".

"That's the spirit boy".

"Why will you force a guy to pout and also blackmail him into doing so?".

Read " From The Eyes Of A Spinster " by the same author ( Murjanatu Alkali )

. Jaafar asked standing beside me, his car keys dangling in his left hand. What the hell is he doing here?.

       "Hi Mujaheed" i said quickly as soon as i spotted Mujaheed behind him "You came just in time. Are you two together?". I asked gesturing towards jaafar.

"Yeah" he replied nodding "said he wants to invite you to his wedding dinner three days from now. Wanna go?".

     You son of a bitch! Why will you invite me to your wedding? So that you can see me breaking down and crying my eyes out? Well am sorry dude, but that's not going to happen, i sure am not going to give you the pleasure. I turned and looked at jaafar before smiling like a loon "Sure, i wouldn't mind. Where's the venue?". I asked.

"Its written on the invitation card". Jaafar replied.

 "Well okay. I'll be there in shaa Allah. Thanks for the invite".

Am i really doing the right thing?