My only addiction - Episode 29

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Ethan's POV
I don't know for what reason but I believe you will come....
I might be the biggest as*hole in the universe but you always understand me....

In my darkest moment, I think of you....
In my sorrows, I need you....

Even thou it seems hopeless to wait, I still believe....

I leaned on the wall beside the door, waiting for her who weirdly knew how to restore my sanity...I take another strong sip of whisky  but it doesn't really dull the ache in my chest...Stupid whisky, you were supposed to help me forget this torture for a while if not a while please a few seconds would go a long way...

I know she will come....I sighed biting my trembling lips...Second after second I would check my phone desperately....It was only thirty minutes later and I feel like it's eternity....

She will come....She would never want to see me hurt or broken....

One hour later...Maybe she is just stuck in traffic.. Maybe she decided to walk here ..Maybe she took a longer shower today...Maybe the taxi's tyre got a puncher...Maybe!!!Maybe!!!Maybe!!!!

I was in the verge of losing all the faith I had placed on her when the bell rang...
I knew she would come....

"Arya????" I said excitedly after I opened the door only to be served with human waste on a golden platter...

"Who is Arya????"
"What do you want???" I sneered...
"We need to talk Ethan....We have a lot of catch up to do...." She smiled...
"I don't have anything to say to you b*tch...." I staggered back...

"I am sure you wouldn't want me to call uncle Jordan and tell him you are been a bad boy...." She faked a sob....

Damnit!!!! I am sure my face was red with suppressed anger...How can God allow such a despicable human being to walk freely on the face of earth???

"Come in...." I breathed out in a whisper....

I held onto the door knob so tight trying to even my breaths....
Virgin Mary caged my rage or else I will kill somebody....

"It seems you have been drinking again.."
"It's none of your business...." I staggered back, my legs feeling wobbly....
"You know what happened the last time you were drunk...We had s*x Ethan..That was the best night of my life...." She smiled wickedly, looking at me like she was undressing me with her eyes...

"You s*duced me!!!!" I yelled and stumbled back...But luckily I didn't fall...I would never be drunk enough to be s*duced by her again...

"Do you want me to help you get to bed????" She asked s*ductively and I stuck myself on the door as if she was a plague ..
"I would rather die than let you touch me again..."
"It's not like you didn't enjoy????"
"What did you expect???? My d*ck was inside you and when it's in there, there is what we call pleasure...Do you want details???" I yelled in emphasis....

"I came to apologise Ethan....I want things to go back the way they were...."She stuttered, taking slow unsure steps towards me....
"What drugs are you high on??? Coc, weed, h*roine or are you doing pills now????"
"Can't you see it???" She shook me by my shoulders and I just looked at her like a damn fool....

I could feel my hate and rage getting the better of me...Her hands on my shoulders disgusted me...

"See what??? That you are a b*tch who loves taking rich men to bed...Or is it that you don't know how to close those things you call legs or is it that you are a desperate b*tch who thinks I will drop my pants just because you think you pretty...I am sorry to disappoint you honey, you ain't my type...."

She widened her eyes at my words but I didn't care...

"I love you...." She whispered,tears dripping from her eyes...Wow I underestimated her...But then I forgot whores scope to any level....

"Love me????" I laughed so hard at her words that my ribs literally began to ache...
"Ethan it's always been you," She cupped my face," Since we were children, I have only and always wanted you...Everytime I tried to get you attention you would always insult me...."

"Too bad, he is off the market...." I said arrogantly...
"Why do you hate me so much Ethan???" She looked into my eyes and all I could see is darkness, hopelessness and desperation...

"Hate is an understatement love...What I feel for you even the devil can't describe???Let's say this if I was told to chose between Hell and you???I would rather be tortured for eternity..."

She staggered back, looking insulted but I didn't care...Actually it felt good seeing her break Infront of me...

"I hate you Sophie Sebastian...." I gulped down another strong sip of whisky....

"I know it was wrong to do what I did five years ago but I just wanted you feel what I felt when you ignored me...Trust me, the guilt is always eating me like hell and today when Troy slapped you, I got crashed...He didn't have the right to do that...I deserved all the insults Ethan...I wronged you and I needed to be punished...."

On second thoughts she needs psychology help...No, she needs to be admitted to a mental asylum...

"Okay message sent home...Can you leave now????"
"Pl....."
"For the minimum respect I have for you because Troy for weird reasons like you, I will tell you to leave my house humanly...."

Few more seconds infront of my face and I will shove her down the balcony...

"Why can't you love me??? I am pretty, smart, successful and our families are so close...."

Her desperation was sucking the life out of me...What part of I hate her does she not understand??? Is it I or is it hate or is it you????

"Thank your God that I am even civil...You ruined my life and for that missy I will never forgive you...Even in the afterlife we shall be mortal enemies...."

I grabbed her by her arm ready to throw her out like the trash she is when she ranted that she needed to pee....
"You can do that at your house!!!!"
"I am so pressed Ethan and I have a very loose bladder...."
"Arrrgh!!!!! two seconds....." I groaned and pushed her back....

When she headed to the bathroom, I continued downing my bottle of whisky feeling disappointed that Arya didn't come...I placed my faith in her, I needed her, I wanted her then where the fuck is she???

When I need her, she should always be there....I should always be her priority....
I slid down to the floor and held my knees so close to my dear chest....It all hurts too much....

I placed my head on my knees when I heard the door bell ring again....What now???? I ignored it but that as*hole on the other side of the wall was so persistent....

I slammed the door open and immediately the insults I had prepped myself to rant on the as*hole on the other side of the door went Mia....

"Arya?????" I am not sure if the word even left my lips...I was so excited too see her....

I looked at her shockingly still not believing she was there when I noticed a bandage on her finger...

Is she in pain???? Is the wound perfectly cleaned??? Is the bandaged properly wrapped??? Is it deep????

"Arya, what happened........" I swallowed my other words  when she suddenly grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me down to her...Our lips crushed hungrily and I was stunned...

I lifted her off the floor  and she wrapped her legs around my waist. I slammed the door close and pinned her on it...I was no longer sad, tormented or angry...Everything felt perfect and in place...

It felt like I was in this beautiful place filled with roses, butterflies and happy ending....

"I am glad you came Arya...." I stammered the moment I managed to break the kiss..
"Just shut up and kiss me before I regret everything...." This time the kisses were more aggressive and harder and I loved it...Damn, sweet bananas...I love this new Arya Infront of me...An animal...

"Ethan, let's forget everything...." She gasped the second I kissed the hollow of her neck...

I told you she always understands....
"I will never hurt you again Arya...." I pulled away from her neck and drowned into those beautiful eyes...

There and then I felt every inch of me perfectly fitted with hers....Whatever was surging through me was zapping at me  like I had touched an exposed wire....

"I know Ethan...You didn't mean to lie to me about Ivy....I know you didn't want to hurt me when you lied about your flight to LA...I am special, that's why you came back right????"

I simply shook my head unable to form words....

"I will always be here for you...People think I am cheap but I am not right????" She stuttered....
"No!!!You are just perfect...." I stammered, a smile forming on my lips...
"Don't hurt me again okay????"

I could feel a weight on my chest and it grew heavier with every breath...Why does she have to be so kindhearted and understanding???

"Yeah..."
"So you will leave Ivy and be with me right????"She cupped my face....

I was in a dilemma....All I saw in her eyes was desperations and an expectation of a Yes...
"We will make love, eat pizza,go to dates and live happily ever after...."She continued....

I wish it was easier Arya...My life is not in my hands anymore...My fans control it, my surname control it, my status control it ..

"Arya, is not that easy... "I blew a heavy breath...
"So you don't like me???" She bit her lips, her eyes everywhere but not on me...

"I didn't say that..."
"Then what???"

What is these women today???? Is there love yourself more than a man deficiency or is it force a man to do your binding syndrome????

"One step at a time...I just can't change my life with a snap...." I explained louder than intended...
"Point taken....Kindly put me down..."
"Arya????"
"No Ethan, your point was clear...."

She slowly unwrapped her legs from waist and I stepped back so she could stand on her feet...
"Arya, I am sorry I lied to you....I am sorry I didn't tell you about Ivy...My life as a celebrity and a footballer is so hectic..." I tried sounding as convincing as possible...

"Prove it then that you are sorry????"She said Icily...
"I...."
"Ethan baby...Why are you keeping me waiting????"

My heart fell on the stomach....I swallowed the lump in my throat scared of what is to come...Jeez!!!I almost forgot she was still here...

The atmosphere suddenly became arctic... Arya's eyes are watering when she turns to looks at me...They are filled with the hurtful question why...

I turned around to finally look at the devil herself and she has a bedsheet wrapped around her..I am sure my eyes fell of their sockets, like what the fuck???

"Are you not going to introduce me to our guest???"

"Sophie, what are you doing????" I raged....
"Oooops!!!I am sorry people...." She uttered a fake apology....

"I think I should go...." Arya stammered in a hoarse voice...
"Arya????" I turned to her but she looked down, her cheeks so wet...
"Don't Ethan.....I will never be good enough..."

"Did I interrupt something????"
"No, I am the one at the wrong place..."

"Arya, she is lying....There is nothing between us...She is a manipulative bitch..." I exploded...
"It's never your fault...You are that perfect Ethan who is always wronged....People wrong you, people hurt you but you never hurt them..." There was this coldness in Arya's eyes that I have never seen before...The screeching pain in her voice shattered me...It's not what she was seeing but as usual Sophie trapped me and made me hurt the person who means the world to me...

"I know I am the worst person in the whole universe but this time I didn't hurt you...I wouldn't do that to you after the LA incidence...." I could feel tears at the corner of my eyes..
"And what are you doing now???A girl is in your apartment naked wrapped in your bedsheet..What am I supposed to believe????What the fuck do you mean by you are not hurting me Ethan????" Her palms flattened against my chest and pushed me but I only staggered ...

"Arya????"
"No, I am done with this madness and this time Ethan I mean it....I don't know how but I mean it... " She wiped her tears with the back of her hands and sighed...
"Don't be done..." I begged almost going down on my knees...

She reached for the door knob and I placed my hand on hers,"Believe me Arya..."
"I do Ethan, you will never change..."

I immediately drop my hand from hers and pulled back. I didn't chase her as she walked away because I didn't have an idea on how to fix this...Instead I stood there broken, running a hand through my hair in confusion....

"She seems like a good girl...."

I turned around and charged towards her like an enraged panther....
"You have crossed all the limits...How dare you do that to my Arya???" I shook her by her arms  vigorously that I am sure she felt pain...
"It's because I love you..."
"Stop saying that!!!" I raise my hand ready to slap her when my mother's words echo in my head...
Only a coward hits a woman...
"I want you out of my house now!!" I began pushing her towards the door...
"It sees she is also your victim...You have hurt her like you did me..."

"Don't ever compare yourself to Arya...You are not even a molecule of what she is...."

"You like her, don't you????"
"Just leave before I kick you out...."
"Why do you hurt us like this????"

"Us, Sophie calling you a woman is a disgrace..You are so cheap that just looking at you disgust me...Nothing can turn me on.." I scanned her disgustingly, gritting my teeth..

"Stop!!!!" She yelled, her dam breaking forth....
"Just leave...."
"I am going to tell Ivy you are cheating on her...."

"Damn!!!!Do you think she will believe that whore who seduced her boyfriend once upon a time or her dear boyfriend who is perfect Infront of the camera???You are so delusional..."

I grabbed her by the arm and threw her out of my apartment...
"What about my clothes????"
"Go wait for them on the other side..I will throw them over the balcony for you...." I snarled...
"What does this Arya girl have that I don't????"

"Dignity and self respect...."
"But she is not your type???"
"That's the thing....My type is disgusting and rotten...I need change..." I slammed the door on her face....

Arya's POV
I wish the tears would drown the pain but it's makes it more real....Reality is worse than denial...

I thought Ian was wrong about Ethan, if I only stuck to our plan then I wouldn't be hurting right now...

I wish I insulted him, slapped his stupid handsome face but No!!!!I had to go in there and make a fool out of myself because I thought he was sorry....

I thought for him and that is stupid....When the elevator arrived on the first floor, I scrambled out as soon as the door slid open, stumbling and falling on the floor...

"Arya????" I heard Ian's voice and in a spur of a moment he had carried me in his arms....
"I failed...." I placed my head on his chest and wrapped my arms around his neck...
"Let's get out of here...."

He placed me carefully on the passenger seat and buckled my seatbelt....He jogged to the other side and slumped on the driver's seat....

"What happened????" He asked...
I hiccuped,tears rolling in quietness....
"You didn't go as by our plan.."
I nodded wordlessly.....
"And by the tears in your eyes, your stupid plan backfired on your face...."

I nodded, looking down at my fingers....

"What the hell happened Arya????" He slammed the steering wheel that I flinched....
"He was having some good time with another woman..."

I felt like he had tore my heart out through my throat .

" I warned you about him but no you love making a fool out of yourself...It's like you find pleasure in Ethan stepping on your self respect...You are beyond help Arya, you need redemption...." He yelled, a false of temper in his voice...

"I am stupid...I am foolish...I am crazy about him...I want to hate him but I can't...." My sobs seemed to increase by every breath...
"It's okay..."He wrapped his arms around me,hugging me so close as I cried on his shoulder....

"I am sorry Ian, I didn't go  as per our plan...."
" And I am sorry I yelled at you and you are going through a rough time..."
"I deserve it...."
"What can I do for you so as you feel better???"
"Just take me home..."

*****
After Jackie opened the door, I looked at her with trembling lips and she read my mind....
She wrapped her arms around me and held me so close....

"I am shattered...."
"I am here for you short woman...."

After hugging for what seemed like forever, we finally pulled back....
"What happened????"She asked...
"Ethan with another woman happened..." Ian answered Icily....
"Arya you went to see Ethan????" Jackie yelled at me...
"I didn't...."
She cut me off,"Aren't you tired of him stepping on your self respect????When will you learn???" She began scolding me....
"I will get going guys, Jackie talk some sense to her...." Ian hugged the both of us and left...

I narrated all that happened to Jackie and all the way she had an angry straight face on...
"I hope this is the last time you seeing her...He is not a prince charming anymore...I am unfollowing him on IG asap...."
"I think I have fallen for him Jackie..." I said in a whisper...

"I thought that was obvious from the beginning..."  She said dryly...
"And I want to let go...I don't know how but I need to..."
"For the best of everyone, I agree Arya...."

He schooled me to finally thinking I have found the one only to realise behind those clever lies I was the fool...

I want to stop...
I am done....
I have had enough....
It doesn't matter what I do..
He will never be with me....
And there is nothing I can do about it....

I need to nothing him...
I am lost, damaged and screwed up...

"I will be here for you all the way short woman..."
"Thank you..."
"Remember it's for the best, you let go...This love is toxic, you have even barely been that close to him and he is already making you cry like it's a high paying job..."
"I don't care if I have to rip my heart out but I am done Jackie...I wish I just stuck to Pascal's bullshit...Things were less complicated back then.."

"No going back to the past, we are moving forward short woman..."

When I meet Ethan, I felt like dark and unexplored all the way down...I felt like I have been loving wrongly....

This isn't good for me anymore...
It's time to let go.....

A/N Hey smile squad, it's been a minute..I am sorry I have been held up at work..I hope you all doing great my people....So what do you think about this Sophie girl????
Trust me, she is getting on my nerves....

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