My only addiction - Episode 28

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Arya's POV
I dropped on my knees as my dam broke...My tears were uncontrollable...

When I met him all I thought was, "Damn it's gonna break me when you leave..." And I was right...

Crying is a way to your eyes speak when you mouth can't explain how you feeling inside...

Ian knelt infront of me and wrapped me in his arms...I wish they made me feel home like Ethan's did but all I could feel was been encaged for comfort...

He soothed me and promised everything would be okay, over and over and over again but I doubted it ...

When he lifted my face to look at him,my sobs increased and no words were courageous enough to leave my lips...

"He is not worth your tears....If you mean something to him then he will fight for you..." He wiped my tears with his thumbs but they were so stubborn...

"He is Ethan Marcias, he will never change Arya...." He cussed out with so much rage in his voice...

"Do you think he will choose me???" I asked in a dry hoarse voice....
"If he really likes you then he will..."

"I want him too Ian...Is it selfish to ask him to leave her for me????"
"But you did a good job Arya....At first you almost fell for his games but I am glad I arrived in time..."

"What if your advice never works??? What if he never comes back??? What if I never see him again???"

I am unable to unsee those hurt beautiful eyes when he left from my mind...Damn!!! I guess I went a little to far...

"Calm down....All we have to do is wait and see what Ethan does..."

"What if....."
He placed his finger on my lips and cut me off, "Enough with the 'What ifs'...."

He stood up from the floor, assisted me to get up and walked me to the sofa...
"Promise you won't do anything stupid????" He asked in a pleading tone the second we sat down...
"I rather not promise because I am sure the moment I see him, I will run into his arms..." I chuckled the moment those words left my lips...I am really a fool...

"So then I won't leave you alone...You need to make him miss you so as he can realise his mistake...."
"I wish that was as easy as it sounds...."
"You just have to believe you can do it...." He took my hand and placed it between his...All I felt was warmth and comfort nothing else...No weird emotions, no spark surging through my body....

The only man who had an effect on me was gone...He left and partially it was my fault....
I could feel tears pricking my eyes and Ian wiped them before they could reach my cheek....
"No more...." He beamed and I gave him a half hearted smile that was strained....

"I am glad you called last night..." He continued...
"Thank you you were there for me...."

Last night....
I tossed and tossed in bed, alot of conflicting ideas going through my head...

I should text Ethan and tell him is a jerk...
No, I should DM Ivy and tell her, I f*cked her man...But that would be hurtful and a lie...The nigga f*cked me in the damn bathroom...
Or I should text the bloggers and leak our conversation and lie he r*ped me....
No Arya, you can't scope that low....Plus you care about him so much to let any harm come his way...

"Arya do you want to talk about it????" Jackie turned around and intertwined our hands...
"I am okay, I am just not sleepy...Go back to sleep, I will do some meditation..."
"And at least try and eat something...I baked you, your favourite cookies..."
"I am not hungry...."

I got out of bed and went to the living room...I leaned my head back on the sofa in a dilemma to which man to call so as to give me advice from a man's perspective...

I can't call Nick, he will be so inquisitive and I will end up blabbing everything...Well Andrew will end up breaking Ethan's nose so it's a No!!!..

I stared at Ethan's photo which was my home and lock wallpaper in my phone for what seemed like forever before dialling Ian's number....He gave me his number the day I delivered cupcakes to them on the football pitch..

"Hello???"

"Hey Ian...It's Arya...Can I talk to you about something????"

"Yes sure....." He sounded drowsy and sleepy..
"I am sorry for waking you up...I know it's midnight and so unthoughtful but...."
"What's wrong Arya??? Talk to me...." He interrupted my long apology speech...

"From a man's perspective, what does it mean when a guy lies to you about his identity and everything and when you find out he says he didn't have a choice..."

There was an awkward weird silence from the other side before he replied," We only do that when we don't want anything serious with a girl...When we love a girl, we tell her almost everything about ourselves even our blood group..."

Ouch!!! So Ethan didn't want anything serious with me...I felt that....
"What if he lied about not having a girlfriend and you come to find out they have been dating for f*cking three years and he stood you up for your dinner date because that witch was robbed and he went to that stupid LA to be with her and there I was looking perfect for him just to make a fool of myself....I didn't listen to my bestfriend when she tried talking me out of that madness and to make matters worse she was right...He didn't care about me..." I sighed...

It really felt good to blab out what I was feeling to a stranger....Maybe partial a friend...Whatever!!!

"Ethan and Ivy..."
"How did you know????" I gasped, feeling like I was out of breath...
"Too much information gorgeous....So as I was saying Ethan and Ivy are a power couple...It's all about the influence, popularity and fame...Its in his nature to use and dump girls but what matters is to not let him get into your head....Us as men we are intimidated with girls who make us chase them not those who are willing to open their legs the moment we call them....Did you already sleep with him???"

Damn!!! His words were like fire to my soul..They were burning me so deep and I hated the brutal honesty I was getting right now...

"No...Yes...No..Yes.." I stammered...
"It seems you already fell for his charms....The biggest weakness in a guy is bruising his ego...Yes you had s*x with him but don't show him it had an effect on you...If he stood you up then show him it didn't matter to you and that life moves on...Being The Ethan Marcias I know if he likes you then he will chase you..."

"Do you think he can leave that witch..I mean Ivy for me????" I bit my thumbnail nervously, hoping he would say yes....
"People in the limelight are so complicated as unpredictable, let's just hope for the best..."
"Thank you so much Ian and goodnight..."
"I hope I will get some yummy cupcakes soon and don't forget men love to chase...We hate easy tasks..Goodnight too gorgeous and don't cry too much..."

How did he know I have been crying????
"What did he say???" Jackie asked the second I hanged up...
"I thought you were asleep...."
"How can I sleep when you were cursing that Ethan so loud????"
"He said I should let him chase me and don't make it easy for him..." I pointed out dryly..
"And he is right....But for now let's play some poker to shift your attention from that fool plus I am no longer sleepy..."
"Okay..."

Now.....
"Do you need a hug???" He asked and I nodded wordlessly....
He caged me into his strong arms and squeezed me a little tighter...I rested my head on his shoulder fighting hard the tears that were making my eyes pepperish...
"You can just let it all out..."

Just what I wanted to hear....I sobbed profusely for what seemed like eternity and all he did was rub my back soothingly....Even though you have hurt me in the past, I can't stand the fact that I bruised your ego...I hope Ian is right and this torture is worth it...I rather die than see your hurt..That's how much you mean to me...

That's it Arya....He is not worth all those tears you have shed...

"I guess I am already dehydrated..." I pulled back and he handed me his handkerchief...
"I don't mind if you feel you still want to let it all out..."
"I am sorry that your denim jacket is all stained with my tears...."
"I don't mind as long as you okay..."

"Let me prepare some sandwich, there is some brawn in the fridge...I hope you are a hungry like I am..." I faked a smile..
"I can prepare them, I am a very good chef..."
"You are my visitor and you have been a good friend to me..."
"But I hope you don't mind me watching...."
"Not at all good chef...." I said sarcastically...
"Are you being sarcastic with me???"
"Am I????"

The room echoed with our laughters and instantly went mute the moment we realised it felt awkward....

I began preparing the sandwiches when a weird idea came to mind...I let out a strangled scream as blood began oozing from my finger...

"Are you okay???"
"What happened???" He asked when he saw my t-shirt stained with blood...
"I cut myself..."

The pain throbbing from my finger was warm and deep but it didn't fulfill its purpose...I thought it would take over the mental pain but  nothing changed...He walked me to the sofa and examined my finger...
"Where is your first aid kit????"
I pointed at him where it was and sat there looking at my finger..
"It doesn't seem that deep...." He commented...

Everytime I hissed or it felt pepperish as he applied the antibiotic  cream, he blew some air over the cut...I wish I had cut myself deeper.... I wish the knife was sharper..I wish I wasn't scared to feel the pain when I was slitting my finger....

I never thought a time would come when I want to inflict pain on myself....

"All done...." He cheered and I just smiled looking at my bandaged finger...
"Thanks...."

"Sweet heavens, why is your t-shirt stained with blood ????" Jackie screamed as she stood shocked by the door...

We both looked at her shockingly and she dropped all the bags she was holding when she saw Ian...
She shook her head, rubbed her eyes, slapped herself severally as if she couldn't believe that Ian was in our house...

"Jackie, kindly collect your jaw from the floor..." I chuckled and Ian just smiled...My hand still on top of his palm...
"Is this really Ian????" She staggered towards us and pinched his nose...
"Ouch!!!" Ian groaned and I couldn't help but giggle...

"I am sorry, I just had to confirm its you...."She covered her mouth embarassingly as tears dripped from her eyes...
"Do you need a hug????"He asked sweetly and she nodded....

As they hugged each other, Jackie said all the silliest things to him and I could see Ian smiling from ear to ear...That's the effect Jackie has on people's lives, she makes everything around you lively...

"I am your biggest fan....I am Harrar Hotspur biggest fan...I am that jerk's Ethan Marcias biggest fan, he is perfect...You, George and Jack are so handsome I can never stop drooling over your muscles..."

She squeezed his firm arms and gasped, "Damn my boyfriend Nick I mean the guy I admire from afar I wish you would see his muscles, they are something to die for..."
"I would love to meet him..." Ian chuckled...
"He is actually your coach...Nick Almasi my brother..." I bluffed..

"Wow!!!! Do you want me to tell him you like him???" Ian teased her and she shook her head vigorously....
"I love to be chased..." She winked and few seconds later, they high five...
"I loved that...I wish Arya would have the same mindset..."
"I rubbing off some of my habits to her but it takes time..."

I cleared my throat and dragged them out of their what seemed like a reunion....
"What happened to your finger???"
"So after taking your time to drool over Mr handsome here, you now recognise me..."

I placed a hand over my mouth after I had realised what I had said and looked at Ian and the nigga was fucking blushing....
"I am sorry short woman....I just got carried away...So what happened???" She asked examining my bandaged finger...
"I cut my finger trying to make sandwiches...."
"I hope it's not paining..." She blew some air over the bandaged finger...
"I hope you realise it's bandaged...."
"I am so confused as fuck after seeing Ian...." She slapped her forehead laughing...

"So ladies, do you care for lunch??? My treat...I think Arya needs some break..."
"No..." I stated...
"Yes, take her out to eat..." Jackie smiled at Ian disregarding my answer...
"What about you????"
"I have to be in the bakery....."
"Okay, so Arya get ready and we will go have some fun..." Lan beamed...

I guess I didn't have a say in this and so I nodded...When I got off my pyjamas, I realised I stunk like hell...I haven't showered in like four days and my breath could send you to comma...
Why did Ian not tell me???I felt embarrassed about myself...

I took a long bathe after which I decided to wear a pair of blue jeans, a simple white top, a blue denim jacket and my black doll shoes...I held my hair in a bun and did a simple makeup...

Go and have fun Arya...You deserve it...
I said to my reflection on the mirror before heading back to the living room....

Ian and Jackie were so engrossed into football matters that they didn't realise I had been standing there for ten minutes now...
"I can't wait for the season to start...."
"Me too...Do you remember that day you scored that one goal twenty seconds to the end of the match??? My heart was in my stomach trust me...." Jackie sighed...
"It would have been a shame to lose to Lia stars..." Ian shook his head...
"But Harrar Hotspur never disappoints...

All episodes of this story can be found here >> https://www.ebonystory.com/story/my-only-addiction

. Ethan's goal in Tanzania was another life saver...You guys always give us this unexplainable tension until the last minute..."
"Yeah...So I hope you will be coming to watch us when our matches are at home???"
"Definitely...."

I cleared my throat when I realised that this conversation was never going to end....
"Arya, you are back???"
"Yes Ian and I have been standing here for the past ten minutes...Shall we go???"
"Sure...I am sorry it's just that Jackie knows alot about football and anything about football gets my full attention..."
"It's was obvious...I can always go  to the bakery and you two continue to discuss about football and stuff..."
"No!!!" They both said in unison and when they realised what they had done, they writhed with laughter...

I guess my bestfriend has finally found herself a male bestfriend...They have like hell alot in common...
"This is your day to shake all those emotions off...Shall we go???"
"Yeah...."
"Have fun short woman,"Jackie whispered as I hugged her,"I see you finally found yourself a male bestfriend...." I teased and she just chuckled...

"Take care of her Ian.." She outstretched her hand for a shake and Ian had her arms outstretched for a hug...Awkward!!!!

"Take care too..."After moments of confusion between them, they finally hugged....
"Hope to see you soon footballer..."
"Me too my biggest fan..."

*****
We went into his favourite Chinese restaurant and he ordered us some sushi...Just a few bites and I was already full....
"Ian, can they wrap for me these????I am already full and I would want to take Jackie some..."
"But you have even barely eaten...."
"I am not hungry..."

How can I eat when all I can think about is Ethan...He has invaded my thoughts like a plague....

"I will buy Jackie some sushi and then you two can eat them later...."
"Okay..."

After lunch, he took me out for shopping but I couldn't chose what to buy...Everything was expensive and beautiful...
"I don't know what to buy Ian..." I groaned as we walked around the tenth boutique..
I thought he would be bored to death but he didn't seem to mind....
"So what's your favourite colour???" He asked...
"White...No black...no I don't know..."
"How can you not have a favourite colour??? Every girl does...."He raised a fraction of his eyebrow at me...
"I am Arya not every girl...Let's go with white then...."

"What about this???" He lifted a similar dress like that Ethan bought me but it was white in colour and I curled my nose...What games is fate trying to play with my mind now???was it a sign???
"You don't like it...It would look perfect on you..."

"Why don't we grab some ice cream????Shopping is tiring..." I faked a yawn...
"Sure, anything you want...Today is your day to shake it off..."

We went to Riee ice-cream parlour and I ordered chocolate flavour as Ian ordered neopolitan flavour (mixture of strawberry,vanilla and chocolate with some sprinkles....)We sat at the corner by the window,admiring the sun set...it was beautiful..

Before I could dig into my bowl of  chocolate ice-cream, my phone pinged with a message....
Bae....
I need you more than ever..please come to me..

"I need to go Ian...." I stammered, standing from my seat when Ian held my hand...
"What did Ethan say???"

"How did you know???"
"He is the only one who makes you look so f*cked up....You look pale and there is worry in your eyes...."
"What if he is in trouble???" I stuttered....
"It would have been all over the media by now...What if it's a way to make you run to him??? He knows every time he needs you,you will go running...." He said harshly with no  filters at all....

Ashamed and agreeing with the probability he is right, I sit  and look down embarassingly...I didn't have the strength to do this, I don't think I can stay away from him like Ian advices me too...

"What did he say???" He finally asked after a weird silence between us...

I pushed my phone to his side of the table and continued looking down...
"That asshole...He is probably lying..." He said Icily...
I remained silent as worry weighed me down....
"I know how to make him know that you are not as cheap as he thought you were...."

Cheap!!!!
Ouch!!!! That hurts my self respect....
"Okay..."
"Text him don't string me along in your drama...."
"What????" I asked in disbelief...
"Do you want him to think you are always there waiting for him???"
"But that's mean....It's too harsh..."
"The world is harsh Arya....did he consider your feelings when he stood you up and went to LA??? Did he consider how you would feel as he comfortably got interviewed????"

I didn't know what was right anymore all I knew is Ian was helping me out as a friend and he knew what would work since he is dealing with this issue from a man's perspective....
"Text that jerk for me Ian...." I whispered and a smile formed on his lips...

"You should definitely resave his contact from bae to Ethan...The bae is giving you ideas in your head...."
"Okay..."
"Here, put your phone in pocket and don't reply no matter how many messages he sends..."
"Okay..."

I looked at his reply and I widened my eyes in shock...
Me....
Don't string me along in your drama...

I wanted to scold him how heartless it was for him to send him such a rude message but then he knows what he is doing....

But what if he is not lying??? What if he need me??? What if something happened to him?? What if he is really sorry for standing me up and lying to me about not having a girlfriend...What if...what if...what if he loves me...what if I am the only girl he thinks about...

But Ian might me right, maybe he is lying as always...What if Ian is wrong, he is human and we are prone to making impaired judgement....I felt light-headed just thinking about everything....

"Arya, your ice-cream looks like porridge now...." Ian commented dragging me away from my disturbing thoughts....
"What if he is not okay???" I lifted my eyes up to look at him and realised it was already getting dark..
"What if he is????"

The thought of him being in trouble and me not been there for him weighed me down with no mercy...

"I will take you at his place, you go see him...Maybe then you will relax..."

I felt a sigh of relief hearing those words from him...My Ethan your Arya is coming....

He read something on his phone and smiled before shoving it in his pockets and we leave....

A/N Hey smile squad, I hope you had a lovely weekend...Do you think Ian is a good or a bad influence to Arya???Comment below what you think...
P/S This is one hell of a long chapter

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Read " Attitude meets Arrogance " by the same author ( Fideh Mwangi )